The Tin Man vs. The Scarecrow
Sunday, July 13th, 2008When watching the finale of The Bachelorette last week, I along with the rest of America, was shocked to see that DeAnna chose Jesse, the snowboarder with long hair and pink shoelaces. Instead of falling in love with the guy with the steady job, good father, who always said the right thing, she went with her heart, and selected the wild card. Why were we shocked though? How was this any different from Trista picking the soft-spoken poetic Ryan over the suave and successful Charlie? Then I reflected on my own life and choices…
Five years ago, if one were to ask me what type of guy I think I would end up with I would’ve likely described the guys both DeAnna and Trista didn’t pick. After all, women want stability…or do they? On July 13, 2004, I had a lunch date with someone who peaked my interest online. Since I was casually dating and not looking for anything serious, I decided to meet this guy with no steady job, a shaved (actually bic’d) head, and plugs in his earlobes. When I actually met him then subsequently saw him daily the next 5 days, I knew that this guy had ignited something in me that I haven’t felt in a long time, if ever.
Fast forward four years and I still feel that spark when I look into his hazel eyes. I am with someone who is genuine and one of the kindest people I know. He still surprises me all the time with his loving gestures like an unexpected foot massage or a Hello Kitty tchotchke. Don’t get me wrong though. I am not one of those people who blindly and willingly sail through a partnership in the name of love. It hasn’t been bump-free or easy. But at the same time, those bumps are what make the relationship stronger and helps you appreciate the smooth times.
Never again will I second-guess a woman’s decision to be with the unconventional, unpredictable partner. Had I gone with my brain, I would have only dated the guys who fit my mold of the perfect mate. I wouldn’t have dated, let alone met the man I think is my soulmate.
Hopefully, when he gets this in his RSS feed he won’t be annoyed with me. But I want to publicly say how happy I am to have found him and remind him how close he was to not being found. 
Happy anniversary Schmoop-tze…woh ai nee.
